Articles Library: Leadership
How to Evaluate Your Style of Dealing With Conflict
It is important that you raise your awareness of your own natural conflict style so that you’ll be able to pinpoint the types of improvements that you need to undertake.
Think about three or four conflict situations at work that you’ve experienced. To learn more about yourself, think of your reactions in those situations. Answer these questions.
1. What were the specifics of the situations?
2. What did people do, or what happened, that got under your skin? Can you identify some of your “button-pushers?”
3. What factors were going on with you at the time? Were you fatigued, upset, worried, or busy?
(Use these first three questions to identify your own high risk factors for conflict.)
4. What did you do?
5. What kinds of things did you think?
6. How intense were your feelings?
7. How did you respond outwardly?
(Questions 4-7 give you some initial insight into your own habitual conflict style.)
8. What was the outcome?
9. Did your response result in the matter of conflict being addressed and truly resolved?
10. What were your feelings afterward?
11. How quickly were you able to let it go?
12. How did you feel about yourself and the way you handled it?
(Questions 8-12 help you discover how well your current methods for dealing with conflict are working.)
Dr. Bev Smallwood is a psychologist and professional speaker who is the author of “This Wasn’t Supposed to Happen to Me.” Visit her website, www.DrBevSmallwood.com; or contact Bev at 601.264.0890 or by email, Bev@DrBevSmallwood.com. Also connect with Bev on Twitter, Facebook, Linkedin, and her blogs, Shrink Rap and New Morning Devotionals.